Dating someone with poor finances
You had too much going on during your divorce to possibly consider dating. This same script, I’m reminded, played out in the life of one of my favorite clients who fell in love with a separated man.Therefore, you seem to think all men should feel the same way. But you are correct in proceeding with a sense of caution. Not because he listed himself as divorced but is really separated. He gave a lot to her during their time together, but, when it got right down to it, he really needed to sow his oats for awhile.
If you apply together, your partner’s poor credit could result in higher interest rates, poor loan terms or even an outright rejection.All you can do is trust your gut and don’t second guess yourself every step of the way. And if you want the support of others who have been through the process of dating after divorce, check out Divorce Net.com, a site where I used to moderate an online dating forum. Building a strong credit score can take years of paying your bills on time, spending wisely and avoiding too much debt.Missed payments on shared accounts will inflict mutual damage to both of your credit scores.Your partner’s poor credit could be due to a history of late payments or accounts in collections, so think twice before sharing.But, most likely, because he’s still emotionally reeling from the death of his relationship. It’s not that he didn’t care about her; it’s that he wasn’t ready for another commitment so soon after declaring his bachelorhood….
I wrote about this extensively here, in a post called “When Do You Begin Dating Again After a Long-Term Relationship or Marriage? And you’re certainly not ready to love with reckless abandon. So, Sara, like most situations that stymie my readers, the answer isn’t as obvious as “dump him” or “go for it.” It depends on the man, the nature of his divorce, his emotional availability, and his ability to get in touch with himself.
You can still split expenses while restricting access to your personal bank account.
You can apply the same strategy to other accounts, including credit cards, loans and any accounts with monthly payments.
Also, it seems that about 40% of the men who state they are divorced are actually still going through the process. That stated, I have come up to some heavy objection from both family and friends – hence I’m here.
They have given many examples of relationships that began quickly after a separation/break-up, so I am beginning to wonder if I am selling myself short – being too rigid.
There are a number of reasons your partner could have poor credit, including unexpected financial hardship or identity theft.